Me? Pump My Own Gas?

Very few of you reading this blog are old enough to remember when pumping gas was a mystery- something done only by professionals. I was probably in high school or college before I pumped my own gas. Attendants filled your tank, wiped your windshield, checked your oil, radiator and even the air in your tires before taking your money.

There was a professional for everything in those days. Your all-knowing physician came to your house if you were ill. A professional sacked your groceries for you and carried them to your car. Even the simplest legal document required that you see an attorney. Every bank transaction required a teller. Every checkout lane had a cashier. Every eating establishment had waiters or waitresses. Every baby was born in the hospital under the no-nonsense control of professionals- no fathers allowed in the delivery room thank you! All television news was delivered by professional talking-heads on network television once each day. All written news was delivered to your driveway morning and evening- written by professional journalists. All television programs were watched when they were broadcast, complete with commercials- or not at all. Our music came on vinyl discs and we played it in the order the record producers wanted us to hear it.

But the world has changed. We pump our own gas and check our own oil. If you want simple medical advice, you search the internet, often discovering more up-to-date information than even your family physician knows. More often than not we sack our own groceries and take them to our own vehicle. If you want a simple legal contract such as a will or trust agreement you simply fill out the forms on your computer and print it out. We handle 99% of our own banking at the ATM machines and we check out our own groceries in the self-service lane. We serve our own tables at all but the nicest restaurants and we expect to be the one in control at the birth of our children; husband present as we make most of the decisions.

We read blogs and websites created by millions of individuals around the world who each are as entitled to share their opinion as Walter Cronkite and Edward R Murrow. Today newspaper "news" means what happened yesterday. We get most of our information via the internet- often in real time. We watch what we want, when we want via time-shifting technology, and we either edit out or fast forward through the commercials. We mix and match our favorite songs and our favorite artists to our own tastes and carry it all in our pocket on our Ipods.

And so of course it was inevitable that the decentralization of service, information and entertainment would come to the church as well. Every other area of our lives has been individualized as we've shouldered the responsibility for how we live our lives. The role of every full-time paid professional is being daily challenged by the decentralization of power and information. Today we can write our own news stories on our blogs, create and broadcast our own movies via youtube, take care of many of our own basic health and legal needs via the internet and yes- even pump our own gas.

And suddenly we find a growing throng of individuals who are no longer willing to sit quietly on Sunday morning, being told everything from how to interpret scripture to where to give their money. These people want to take an active part in their own faith and are no longer willing to let spiritual professionals and institutions be their primary connection to God. They want to pray for the sick themselves, direct their own giving, create their own worship services, study the scriptures for themselves, serve the poor in their own community and become as much a part of the sharing of God's truths with others as yesterday's priest, pastor or theology professor.

But then doesn't that sound a lot like the disciples? Didn't that rag-tag band of working-class tradesmen turn the world upside down in the first century? Didn't those non-professionals simply share what they had seen and experienced with others, as they went about their business praying for the sick, teaching the scriptures, worshiping God and giving freely of themselves? Didn't they have the same empowering Holy Spirit that we've been given?

Maybe I don't need someone to pump my gas for me after all. At least, that's the way Boompa sees it.

If Only I Could Get My Father's Attention

New babies are amazing, aren't they? There's absolutely nothing they can do to help themselves or to try to impress us. And yet as a new parent or grandparent we love them so much it almost makes our heart ache sometimes.

I think that's how it is between us and the Lord, don't you? He's crazy-in-love with us not because of how much we do for Him or how "spiritually mature" we are or even because of how much we love Him. He just loves us because we "are".

So then why are we always so busy; busy trying to get His attention, earn His affection, win His favor? Why do we insist on always trying to "do something" for God? Why can't we just rest in the knowledge that He loves us, died for us and can't stop thinking about us?

In a book I read recently the author suggested that we would do well to simply learn to abide in His presence without any agenda. We can't impress Him and we can't make Him love us any more than He already does. If He is truly the vine and we're the branches then simply "being" connected to Him is our highest accomplishment. If He was wanting us to be perpetually achieving great things on His behalf we would be called "human doings" instead of "human beings" according to that author.

I agree. I'm tired of doing and I just need to learn to be. At least, that's how Boompa sees it.

Impending Explosions

The explosion rocked our house. We knew something nearby had just blown up. It turned out to be a house less than half a mile down the road. The fire engines raced to the scene, battling the resulting inferno for nearly 90 minutes but by then it was too little, too late. There was nothing they could do to save the hollow shell that had once been a house.

In another, unrelated story, the argument spilled out of the neighbor's house and exploded out into the street. The Christian couple with five young children was at it again. This time the police came and took the husband away in handcuffs. The marriage counselors raced to the scene, battling the inferno of enflamed hearts for nearly 90 days but by then it was too little, too late. There was nothing they could do to save the hollow shell that had once been a happy home.

Both the home down the road, and the marriage down the street had appeared to be perfect to any casual passerby driving through our neighborhood. But there was something horribly wrong with them both. There was an impending explosion, just waiting to happen and destroy the lives of both families. One of the families will rebuild their house and pick up their life where they left off the day of the explosion.

But the other family will never be the same. Divorced now, the mother works to support the five children. The father and his new girlfriend live not far away and he sends his child support payment in monthly. But for the children, the sirens that sounded that day signaled the end of life as they had known it.

As Chrstians, we always want everything to look nice from the street. In real estate they call it "curb appeal." In church, they call it "the perfect Christian marriage." Both our house, and our marriage needs to look perfect to those who drive by- even when there is an impending explosion.

Jane and I are committed more than ever to bringing help and reality to Christian marriages that look perfect on the outside, but are about to explode on the inside. If there's one place we can't afford to pretend- it's our marriages. We must get real; real with God, real with each other and real with those who can help our marriage before the explosion takes place. At least, that's how Boompa sees it.

Who Knew?

Although I take almost all of the photos on this blog, I didn't take this one. I feel like I'm old enough to have been around in July of 1888 when this photograph of 8-year-old Helen Keller and her teacher Anne Sullivan was taken- but I don't remember ever having been in Brewster, MA so it couldn't have been me, right?

But it struck me as an interesting reminder of how little we know about the future, and how much the Lord knows. Duh!

Who could possibly have known when that photograph was taken of a blind, deaf girl sitting with her doll and her tutor, that Helen Keller would go on to become one of the most famous Americans in history? Certainly not the photographer who tucked it away in a family album where the photograph languished for nearly 120 years. And certainly not Anne Sullivan or even Helen Keller herself. And perhaps least of all her parents, who just hoped that their daughter might not end up living as a vegetable, tucked away in a dark room with a nurse.

None of us knows the end of the story when we're in the middle. None except the Lord. We would perhaps shrink away in fear if we had any idea of what the future holds- good or bad. Mr. and Mrs. Keller had no more idea than Mr. and Mrs. Moses, or Mr. and Mrs. Saul of Tarsus what the future held for their child.

I suspect Mr. and Mrs. Jesus had more of an idea... but surely they didn't comprehend the horror that would precede the glory.

Our job is to simply put one foot in front of the other, one day at a time as we raise our children. Loving them, teaching them and surrounding them with patience, wisdom, honesty and grace. The rest is up to God. At least, that's the way Boompa sees it.

A Few Reflections on Reflections

The Bible tells us that we respond to God because "He first loved us." In other words, we reflect the radiant love that He bestowed upon us- even while we were yet sinners, the Bible adds. While we were in open rebellion, denying God's very existence or shaking our angry fist in His face- He still loved us with a relentless, reckless love that illuminated our own face in glorious reflection.

The Bible also tells us that husbands are to love their wives the way Christ loved the church- willing to lay down His life for her, initiating reconciliation where there was no way and loving us, even when we were unlovable.

And so what is the logical response in the heart of a woman whose husband loves her the way Christ loved the church? She will, of course, reflect that love back. She can't help but reflect the selfless love of a husband who takes the initiative in reconciliation- even when it's the wife who might be wrong.

Wives were created to be responders- reflecting the love that illuminates them. It's their natural bent- their natural function. Like a mirror, a woman reflects what she is being shone. Like a brilliant moon on a dark winter night, a woman who is loved by her husband in a Christ-like fashion is radiant- glowing with a reflected love which lights up everything in her path.

Show me a woman who lacks that glow, and I'll show you a husband who hasn't been loving her in a selfless, Christ-like way. A woman simply reflects what she receives.

I pray that I might be better at loving my wife in a Christ-like fashion, and I pray that I might bask in the glow of her reflected love. It's the natural order of our roles. At least, that's the way Boompa sees it.

Purpose or pleasure?

I see them all the time around Lake Michigan; huge, beautiful, insanely expensive yachts sitting quietly with their sails furled- the owners sipping margaritas and catching a few rays.

Maybe they were inspired by Jimmy Buffet- the voice of all things pleasurable from cheeseburgers in paradise to wasting away in margaritaville.

But I can only scratch my head and wonder how one can be content to sit at anchor when one has a yacht capable of sailing around the world.

We're not much different though, I guess. We've been given the Holy Spirit- able and willing to lead us on a world class adventure but most of settle for swinging around the anchor rope aimlessly; watching the world go by.

I'm ready to hoist my sails and see where the Spirit of God takes me- to follow the wind and find God's purpose for my life. I think I've had enough of cheeseburgers and margaritas for the time being. How about you? At least that's the way Boompa sees it.

Fresh picked blueberries...

You ought to have seen what I saw on my way
To the village, through Mortenson's pasture today:
Blueberries as big as the end of your thumb,
Real sky-blue, and heavy, and ready to drum
In the cavernous pail of the first one to come!
And all ripe together, not some of them green
And some of them ripe! You ought to have seen!

Thus begins Robert Frost's poem Blueberries. My wife Jane often quotes those first seven lines from memory- especially when we're picking fresh strawberries under the warm July Michigan sun.

If you've never picked fresh Michigan blueberries you have no idea what blueberries are all about. The tiny, shriveled caper-like excuses for blueberries found in a polyethelene bag in the frozen food section of your grocery store are NOT fresh blueberries! No, a fresh blueberry, as Frost observed, is as big as your thumb and heavy.

It's kind of like that with the process of hearing from the Lord. Reading a great Christian book or hearing a well-prepared sermon may satisfy our hunger a bit- but it will never taste like the real thing, fresh from the bush. When the Lord speaks to us directly we realize how much is lost in the process of commercial picking, freezing and thawing.

So how can you pick fresh blueberries?

Through prayer, through meditation, through worship, through fasting. It's during those times that the Lord so often drops a fresh insight into our personal pail- as big as your thumb; fresh and ripe. When we savor the sweetness of fresh fruit we realize that second-hand blueberries, given to someone else and then served up later will never be quite the same.

Why not spend a little personal time with the Lord this week and see what He has to say to you.

Mmmmmm.... fresh blueberries! Frozen berries just aren't the same. At least that's how Boompa sees it.

Didn't Jesus deal with the Sabbath?

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After the Pharisees criticized Jesus for allowing his disciples to pick some grain on the Sabbath day, Jesus said, "The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath" (Mark 2:27).

I understand this to mean that the sabbath is no longer the master over us and our lives- but rather we are now the master over the sabbath. We need no longer conform our lives to the sabbath, but rather conform the sabbath to our lives.

And again Jesus dealt with this...

On a Sabbath Jesus was teaching in one of the synagogues, and a woman was there who had been crippled by a spirit for eighteen years. She was bent over and could not straighten up at all. When Jesus saw her, he called her forward and said to her, "Woman, you are set free from your infirmity." Then he put his hands on her, and immediately she straightened up and praised God.

Indignant because Jesus had healed on the Sabbath, the synagogue ruler said to the people, "There are six days for work. So come and be healed on those days, not on the Sabbath."

The Lord answered him, "You hypocrites! Doesn't each of you on the Sabbath untie his ox or donkey from the stall and lead it out to give it water? Then should not this woman, a daughter of Abraham, whom Satan has kept bound for eighteen long years, be set free on the Sabbath day from what bound her?"

When he said this, all his opponents were humiliated, but the people were delighted with all the wonderful things he was doing. (Luke 13:10-17)

The same story, it seems to me. The religious leaders of the day were scandalized that Jesus would "do something" on the sabbath. Yet Jesus says there are things which take priority over the sabbath. Perhaps more importantly, this all comes down to Jesus purpose for becoming incarnate and dwelling among us.

The religious leaders of the day were self-assured in their list of do's and don'ts, their keeping of the sabbath, their avoidance of contact with "sinners" and their observance of the law. If Jesus had come and affirmed that this was what it takes to enter the Kingdom of Heaven- it would have been a difficult burden- a heavy yoke. People ALREADY were under this burden... bearing this yoke and to be perfectly honest, had Jesus reaffirmed this message it would have been received as "The Bad News" of the gospel.
But it wasn't bad news. It was GOOD NEWS! It was VERY, VERY good news!!

Everywhere Jesus went people were astounded by the scandalous, outrageous, breathtaking magnitude of the Good News: We couldn't earn our way into heaven. Those who looked least likely to enter the Kingdom were invited to dine with Jesus, to talk, to confess their sins and to explore this new spiritual world where everything was upside down- the last were to become first, the first were to become last, the employee who had worked only an hour received the same wage as the employee who had worked 10 hours, the prodigal son received a banquet while the older brother received a reprimand, those who were dead in their trespasses were suddenly made alive. It was a topsy-turvy gospel that was indeed Good News!

To those who took pride in their observance of the law it was Bad News. But to the rest of us- those of us who KNEW we couldn't ever keep every letter of the law- those of us who KNEW we weren't deserving of entering the Kingdom of Heaven; to US it was Good News beyond our wildest hopes!

Even the sabbath was turned upside down. Clearly Jesus WAS in the temple on the Sabbath so He wasn't telling us never to go there, but he was very clear about not allowing the sabbath to take control of our lives. I see that as Good News indeed. ALL of it!

We are no longer to be slaves to a dead list of do's and don'ts. Instead we are made alive- free in the Spirit to have life and to have it abundantly. We no longer have to attend sabbath services because they're required. Rather- we now have the privilege of entering into the Rest, bought by Jesus on Calvary anytime- anywhere- every day. And while I attend church most Sundays, I would never allow myself to become a slave to that schedule when there is a wide, wonderful world full of people Jesus loves and died for out there- waiting to hear the Good News of the gospel.

If we believe that team sports are a good thing for our children to develop relationships, socialization, learn teamwork, develop physical fitness, etc. then I would find a middle ground. I would NOT sign up for a program where every game is played on Sunday mornings!! But neither would I reject a program where there were Sunday games from time to time. The fellowship and encouragement to non-Christians on the team may be the very reason the Lord placed you on that team for a season. At least that's how Boompa sees it.

Repeating Patterns

Do you have patterns that keep repeating themselves in your life? Most of us do.

Perhaps it's saying things you shouldn't say and then having to apologize. Or maybe it's buying things you shouldn't buy and then having to figure out how to dig out of the financial hole you've dug yourself into.

Perhaps your marriage falls into predictable patterns of abusive behavior, bitterness and anger followed by having to actively work at healing the wounds that have been created.

Or maybe it's the pattern of getting motivated for the latest weight-loss program, losing 10, 20, even 30 or more pounds only to gain it back again a few months later.

But here's the good news. We serve a God who is a pattern-breaker. His specialty is breaking well-established, seemingly unbreakable patterns. As far as we know, Jesus broke pretty much every pattern the world had seen up until His appearance. And He can help you break repeating patterns too- if you'll invite Him into the process. At least that's how Boompa sees it.

A Good Shepherd's Dog

Meet Mudge. He's my Australian shepherd. In this photo he was just a few months old. He turns two this month.

That's a pretty typical pose for Mudge- waiting patiently and watching alertly for any signal from me that somethings' up.

If I move, Mudge moves. If I sit in a chair, Mudge sits at my feet. If I go into the other room, Mudge walks at my feet. If I lie down on the bed... well... yes, Mudge jumps up on the corner of the bed and sleeps at my feet.

I know some of you aren't "dog people." But that's not the point. The point is this. Mudge was bread to work in partnership with a good shepherd-- sitting patiently and waiting until he sees the shepherd make a move. Then he's "all in" for the duration until the sheperd sits down and then a good shepherd's dog lies down beside him and waits... indefinitely.

We serve not just a good shepherd, but rather The Good Shepherd. Would that I were more like Mudge- willing to simply sit at His feet for as long as need be; willing to wait patiently on His next move- then eagerly throwing myself "all in" to whatever I see the Good Shepherd doing. Never moving unless The Good Shepherd is moving, but never lagging behind once The Good Shepherd shows me what to do next- that's how I want to be.

Lord, give me the patience to not run ahead of you, not take on battles that you're not fighting and to keep my mouth shut when you're not speaking. Lord, give me the desire to simply sit at your feet until you move. And then Lord, cause me to run with all that I am until your good will has been accomplished- then lead me to sit at your feet once more. Amen.

That's what I need to become. At least that's the way Boompa sees it.

Turn Full Into the Wind

Ever watch a gull? They always turn into the wind to find the lift they need for takeoff. If they turn and run with the wind there is no lift over their wings. If the wind is strong enough takeoff becomes impossible. Even under the best of conditions it's infinitely more difficult for a bird to break free from the ground with the wind at its' back.

Why do we always want to run with the crowd? Whichever way the wind is blowing today, that's the way we want to run. If public opinion is flapping in the wind about the importance of training a child's mind in the finest Greek tradition, we all want to run that way.

If the latest child-rearing theory is to make sure our children are never allowed to encounter the fallen world into which they've been born... we're likely to get run over if we don't start running with the crowd quickly enough.

I suppose running with the wind isn't a bad strategy... if you're content to run. But for those who long to fly it's a recipe for failure.

God invites us to stand quietly... and then to turn full into the wind of the Holy Spirit, looking confidently to our Source rather than running with the latest homeschooling fad. And in that moment when we turn and lift our arms toward heaven... we take flight, rising gently at first-- then soaring above the angst-driven mob clamoring below like so many earth-bound gulls running, chasing and squawking after yesterday's stale bread crumbs.

Only then do we begin our ascent in earnest, climbing toward the heavenlies with amazingly little effort on our part. We were never meant to chase after crumbs in the wind. We were created to fly. At least that's how Boompa sees it.

Making Children Obey is a Cinch

So say several popular homeschool pundits and poets. "Just keep applying the pressure until they finally understand who's in charge. They'll obey all right!" And so they will.

He was a good horse with a soft eye and a heart as big as a Montana sky. But by the time I bought Dart he was afraid of all humans; head down, spirit broken, shying if you so much as raised a hand to stroke his neck. He'd been raised with that theory and he had learned to obey. He had learned who was boss. And he had the scars to prove it... a foot long on both sides and as white as bleached bones in the Arizona desert.

When the cinch was tightened down so tight he could no longer breathe or struggle he had become compliant and obedient for the proud rider to show off to all his friends-- the perfectly obedient horse.

But you know, the color never did grow back on his rib cage where that cinch had nearly carved the heart out of him; a cinch so tight it left permanent scars on the outside... and on the inside.

It took a lot of love and a lot of patience for Dart to regain his ability to trust anyone. You see, he had wanted to serve and to please all along. It was in his very nature to partner up and work together. But I guess he wasn't learning fast enough to please his previous owner.

Some of us still have scars from being cinched down too tight. Some visible... but mostly on the inside. And our children are just like us. Yep... making children always obey the first time and every time is a cinch all right- but at what price to their souls... and to ours. At least that's how Boompa sees it.

A Feast Fit For Kings and Queens

One of the subjects we deal with in our Real Life Marriage seminars is sexual intimacy.

Besides the obvious physical pleasures, there is a spiritual component through which the relentless, tugging separation that seeks to divide a husband and wife is pushed back for a season; the two are re-joined. That re-connection is a feeling we long for at the deepest core of our being- to be rightly connected to someone who loves us and accepts us as we are.

Yet we try to fill that longing with all sorts of substitutes; pornography, infidelity, perversion and more. God intended us to dine at the most luxurious restaurant in the world, eating delicacies set aside for kings and for queens. Yet we persist in trying to satisfy that appetite by dumpster diving.

This particular post is perhaps less a condemnation of dumpster diving, than it is a standing ovation for the miraculous gift of sexual intimacy between a husband and wife- a gift worthy of celebration and thanksgiving. At least that's how Boompa sees it.

Why did this little piggy have roast beef?

And perhaps more profoundly- why did that little piggy have none? I can't answer that, but I do wonder at the joy in the eyes of children as we play this and other silly little games with them. All they really want is a little of our time. When I take time to play with children, or even just to talk with them, their eyes light up like they've just spent time with (fill in the name of whoever you'd most like to meet; the President, or Oprah, or Elvis). That's good for the ego, eh? And it's good for them. I never cease to be amazed at how little effort it takes on my part to change a child's world. And you walk away feeling like the President... or Oprah... or Elvis! How cool is that?!? At least that's how Boompa sees it.